S1E16 - "Outlaws"

This episode is about people who are outside of the law.

01:47  I'd make a joke here, but domestic violence is never funny.

02:54  Is that a boar, or is Hurley just looking for a midnight snack?  HA HA FAT JOKES NEVER GET OLD AND I AM A HORRIBLE PERSON

03:38  Ooh, creepy whispering voices in the jungle.

05:03  Matthew McCoughnadickname:  "Mohammed" (for Sayid, obviously)

06:32  HOLY SHIT A TERMINATOR IN SAWYER'S HOTEL ROOM

12:19  Har har, you got all muddy.  This boar's got a vendetta.

13:05  She's worried about him getting lost.  But that's the name of the goddamn show!  They're all lost!  And while we're talking about the irony of a lost person getting meta-lost (or are they meta-lost already?), how big is this island that they haven't sort of circumnavigated it already?  I mean, they've only showed us beach, never any sort of rocky shore or anything preventing them from doing a complete circuit of the thing.  What the craps, come on!

16:52  So how is Evangeline Lilly a super-tracker all the sudden?  And carte blanche means white card, not blank check.  I mean, I guess she could be translating it idiomatically, but fuck her. 

17:53  McCoughnadickname:  "Sassafrass"

20:14  This chick totally wants some Sawyer action, for real.

21:21  Drink it up, murderer.

21:32  McCoughnadick took a drink too.  I WONDER WHO HE KILLED.  CERTAINLY NOT THE MAN WHO LED HIS FATHER TO KILL HIMSELF AND HIS MOTHER, HUR DE DUR DAH DOH

23:38  She just said the board has a vendetta too.  Maybe I was a writer for this show and didn't even know it!

26:17  So the con man who got his parents killed runs a food truck?  Fucking hipster. 

26:50  OH WAIT ITS THE DRAMA TEACHER FROM MY SO CALLED LIFE.  Being mocked by Ricky Vasquez must have really sent him on a downward spiral.

28:17  Aww, Sawyer pussed out.  So who did he kill, if not Sawyer Prime?

30:02  "So we're in hell, huh?"  Please don't tell me this show ends up being some existentialist Jean-Paul Sartre "No Exit" "Hell is other people!" shit.

34:32  "You're not alone."  I should post this song that . . . oh wait.

36:46  Of course it wasn't really Sawyer Prime.  I mean, I saw that coming a mile away.  Oldest trick in the book, man.  Always double-check your information.  Philip Marlowe would never have fallen for that.  Er, except I think he did, once. 

40:57  "What'd she give ya?"  A handie! 

41:12  Aaaaand McCoughnadick just realized that he met Jack's father.  I bet he doesn't say anything to Jack about it!